January always brings a fresh start, as we all shed off the sugary, unstructured fog from the holiday season. With the New Year many people set out to identify and chase their New Year’s resolutions. The dictionary definition of a resolution is “a firm decision to do or not to do something.” This carries expectations and often the idea of success or failure. I encourage my clients to seek out New Year intentions as a more flexible way to think about self improvement. Compared with the rigid definition of a resolution, the word intention is defined as “a thing intended; an aim or plan.” Reflect on how these two definitions land differently when it comes to motivation. Rigid expectations that involve extinguishing unhealthy behaviors often create self-sabotage or paralysis to motivate, whereas flexible goals to add in more healthy behaviors can inspire more sustainable change.
Let’s put this into practice…In 2025, I resolve to adhere to a carb-free, dairy-free diet versus In 2025, I intend to add more fruits and vegetables to my daily diet. Here’s another…In 2025, I resolve to go to sleep by 10pm every night versus In 2025, I intend to implement a bedtime ritual that includes a nightly meditation and cup of tea. In 2025, I resolve to only spend 1 hour per day on my phone versus In 2025 I intend to put my phone on ‘do not disturb’ from 6-8pm.
Behavior change is complex and as humans we naturally resist change at all costs. Everyone is wired differently and I would encourage you to examine what motivates you. Think back to past experiences in your life when you were able to successfully motivate yourself to create a positive change, and unpack the factors that supported the behavior change.
The differences between intrinsic motivation and extrinsic motivation are a place to start. Intrinsic motivation is about engaging in an activity for the satisfaction of the activity itself rather than a reward or outcome. This could mean playing a sport because you love it, not to win a championship…it could mean learning to play a new instrument because music makes you feel happy, not because you want to get a record deal…it could mean volunteering because it fulfills you, not to add it to your resume. Some people just aren’t wired to be motivated by the “experience” or setting goals for something that is fun…they need a specific reward to incentivize them into action. Extrinsic motivation is the drive to participate in an activity to gain a reward, avoid punishment, or meet an external goal. This could mean working hard at your company to receive a generous year end bonus…this could mean studying for weeks to get an A…this could mean a child that only eats their vegetables to earn dessert. The more you understand what drives you, the more empowered you will feel in setting intentions that translate into long term behavior change.
Happy New Year’s and go forth and set your positive intentions for 2025!